13 Going on Thirty

After a long bout with flu last week just like GMA (LOL), I’m back to my usual noisy crazy self. “Magaling na yan kase maingay na naman (She’s well already since she’s noisy again),” according to my officemates. Blame it on the constant heavy rains and stress. I’m sharing with you some of my personal quick pick me-uppers which proved to be an effective cure to the highly resistant flu bug that sent me to a temporary low. Alright it was more of the gazillion fever, cough and cold medicines that I took that made me well. But hey, at least I thought I was healed psychologically!

1. Wear red lipstick and heels

After my sister Nat gave up on me by saying “Kapoy!” (I’m tired!) everytime I ask her if I was still pretty (Gwapa dyapon ko Tik?), I took matters into my own hands. I wore red lipstick and/or high heels to compensate for the “I-look- pitiful” eyes and runny nose almost all the time. Red has always been the original sexy color and red lipstick veers the attention away from the eyes or even your pimples (he,he,he). Heels makes you feel taller and thus sexier. At least those two gave me that illusion that I still look ok.

2. Walk around the UP oval

To activate my happy hormones, I resorted to walking around my favorite place on earth, the UP (Diliman) campus. He, he, he. Alone. Yes, alone. I get a natural high when I’m just by myself. That’s the time that I get to think a lot about my future - future expenses. He, he, he. But the sense of peace was short-lived when my former students started appearing from all sides and was teasing me left and right. I guess they had fun seeing me in my most unglamorous state, sans make-up, wearing casual shirt, shorts and rubber shoes. Oh well, at least they know celebrities are also just human. He,he,he.

3. Meet high school friends

Nothing beats the humor of my high school “Bisaya” friends as antidote for my depression. We never seem to grow tired reliving those days when we thought we were so fashionable in our folded faded pants, hairnet-teased hair and padded shirts and gyrating to the music of Milli Vanilli. Gosh, we have indeed come a long way. No doubt my gay bestfriend always tells me now that I’m fabulous, fabulous, fabulous! He, he, he. It didn’t hurt also that we shared those baduy stories over dinner of lechon and sukang pinakurat flown from our hometown Iligan. When your doctor warns you about the flu symptoms like fever, runny nose, cough and loss of appetite, I say the last one is a lie. At least for me the loss of appetite is the last to go. He, he, he.

4. Stay in bed with your magazines

I’d say that the magazine is one of man’s greatest inventions. Imagine food, fashion, beauty, lifestyle, interior designing, movies, music, gossip, etc. all in one easy-read! I can stay in bed all day with flu if I get my supplies of favorite magazines. Sorry, I never liked reading and eating at the same time. That would have been the perfect combination for others.

5. Eat your pride and say sorry

There’s a different kind of healing you get when you are able to do the right thing inspite your normal rebellious and prideful ways. Saying sorry is something I always have so much difficulty doing. I feel I’m just so adorable that you’ll likely be the first to give up and make friends with me after a fight. All my friends will attest to that. He, he, he. Yes, I admit to be very sensitive and "Alaskador" at the same time. I get hurt easily and it’s hard for me to forgive those who have hurt me. I have mastered the art of “cold” war. It’s in our genes, ok? I took that after my father! He, he, he. I was struck by what my Bible study leader once said, “Imagine if God wasn’t as forgiving to you, what would happen to you now?” She also said that unforgiveness is a curse and it prevents us from receiving God’s blessings. I got scared so I said sorry to someone even if I was the one who got hurt. He, he, he.

So, what’s your quick pick me-uppers?

My father has this interesting way of teaching us about life’s lessons. One of which is how you should never pity yourself because there will definitely be someone who is worse off than you (Dili ka luoy kay ang ubang tawo mas luoy pa sa imo!). Sounds a little evil no? But it has worked for us all the time everytime we start complaining about the littlest of things. 

When we were young(er), we would complain everytime we have fish for viand (Isda na sad ang sud-an?) You see, in the province if you have fish regularly in your meals, it means you are too poor to afford meat (nowadays, it’s the other way around). Of which my father would reply, “May gani nay sud-an, ang ubang tawo  way makaon!” (We should be lucky we have fish for viand, other people do not even have food to eat). That would always end the discussion on the family table.

One time, my younger sister complained about how ugly her feet were (pangit kaayo akong tiil Pa!). My father told her, “May gani nay tiil, katong usa ka babaye sa bukid, way kamot, tiil iyang gamiton sa tanan! (Good for you that you still have feet, there’s this woman in the farm who doesn’t have limbs and uses her feet to do everything!). And He would not grow tired of telling (and retelling) us about this woman he knows that uses her feet to wash clothes, tend to her sari-sari store and take care of her children. 

When we complain about commuting downtown instead of riding on his red pick-up when we are in the province, he would angrily reply, “May gani ang inyong problema kay kapoy ra, ang uban tawo wa ganiy pliti muadto sa syudad!” (Good for you that you only have to complain that you get tired when you commute, other people don’t even have money for fare!). When he does that, it really becomes the end of the story for us. I mean, how do you react to that anyway?

When we got older, we would tease each other about what our father would have to say about our complaints (unsa na pud kahay isulti ni Papa?). We would end up laughing as we mimic him.

So I’ve developed my own set of cure for my current rants. Here are some:

1.                 “There’s not so much to do (yet) in my new job so I’m getting bored na!”

You are just so lucky to even have (1) a stable job and (2) a job that you like without so much stress. Many people either don’t have a job or have one that they don’t enjoy!

2.                 “I don’t want to drive in Manila anymore!”

Other people don’t have something to drive and have to commute this rainy season with their heels and skirt, take that! Other people drive a manual transmission vehicle. Worse, like what my father would say can’t even go to work or school because they don’t have fare!

3.                 “I’ll be 30, and I’ m not married yet!”

Think about other people you know who are in abusive relationships where boyfriends/husbands don’t love their girlfriends/wives as they ought to. Either the boyfriend/husband is insensitive, not thoughtful, not demonstrative and even physically abusive. By the way, I thought you don’t want to have a poor husband?! Or are you just sour-graping? He,he,he.

4.                 “I’m fat! (except in the butt!)”

With your kind of appetite who eats anything and everything all the time, who doesn’t have any form of exercise at all (not even walking), sleeps as if you were Sleeping Beauty, you are just so lucky that you are not obese!

   

5.                 “I don’t have a good set of teeth!”

Inspite your imperfect yellowish teeth, you are just so lucky that you can still enjoy the taste of food to the fullest, which people with dentures cant anymore. He,he,he.

Bad no? Tsaka ang babaw ng mga concerns! “Mao ra na imung problema?” (That’s your only problem?!), my father would probably say.  How insensitive! But I’m not complaining either! Ha, ha, ha.

Have you had any rants lately? Let me see if you have your self-cure too!

Kaliwete - that is what my father sometimes refer me to, aside from “way lubot” or sapyot (“flat butt” in English; “walang pwet” in Tagalog).

“Walhon!” is what my sisters occasionally teases me when I couldn’t do things right (pun intended).

Yes, I’m the more unique of the two sides of the human species. I’m left-handed. A true blue left-handed. I do everything with my left. I eat with the spoon on the left, wear my pants left feet first, wear my watch on the left, do bunong braso (arm wrestling) with my left, read the papers backwards, etc.. And I share the billing with celebrities like Julie Roberts, Nicole Kidman and yes, including Ate Vi.

Being left-handed has several downsides. In high school and college, I had to struggle with right-handed armchairs that made writing much more difficult. I could certainly attribute that to why I didn’t do well in school. I wasn’t able to convince my parents with that though (he, he, he). Is that why I didn’t grow up having a good handwriting too? Ha!   

There are no scissors for left-handed (at least in the Philippines) that’s why I couldn’t cut anything straight. That left my two sisters (older and younger) to do all the cutting for me including covering my books while I was in school (ok fine, up until now!) Probably that’s the reason why I never got interested in craftmaking. Even sewing was difficult because I do running stitches backwards! If I start opening a can, I had to finish it all the way through. Otherwise, if I ask a right-handed to continue it for me, it would be difficult because I do it counterclockwise! I can’t dance well with a partner because it’s always automatic for me to put my left feet out first. Playing the guitar also looks awkward for me. So where did that theory about the left-handed being the more artistic come from huh? I’d like to refute that! But I can sing though. He, he, he.   

Just last Friday night when I arrived home, I panicked when I found out that while my closet was neatly organized and my clothes nicely folded by my sweet sister Nat, she had all my hangers in a different orientation – the hooks were facing left! I told her my left brain only recognizes that the hooks have to be facing right so my hands are starting to get epileptic when I got my clothes in the hanger. 

Trivia: Don’t you know that one way to distinguish a man’s shirt from a woman is to which side the buttons are located? For women, it has to be on the left, for men, on the right. And there’s even a story behind it about the man taking out his sword and putting on his shirt at the same time or something like that.  He, he, he. Plus the left is often associated with the “evil” one and so it is disrespectful to eat with a spoon on your left (hey, we didn’t choose to be like this!). There’s also a story behind that, I heard. Was Judas sitting on the left side of Jesus on the Last Supper too? Dan Brown, is that you again? He, he, he.

Anyway, while being a left-handed has its downside, there are also advantages to it. My former badminton coach said, my being left-handed is an advantage (aside from my height, he said), because my opponent will have more difficulty in approximating the trajectory of the incoming shuttlecock. But hey, how come I never saw that advantage in any of the games I played, Coach? (he, he, he).

I can hold hands with my special someone even when we’re both eating! Isn’t that sweet or what? Kissing doesn’t need to be difficult too, I guess. He,he,he.     

And what else… uhm… uhm… That’s it pancit?!!! Gosh, now I’m starting to think that there’s a worldwide conspiracy going on. We are actually left (no pun intended) at a disadvantage from the right-handed! Ha! But no! He,he,he.   

Anyway, last weekend I had the chance to think about most of the things I had on my left. And here’s what I discovered:   

1.                 I sleep on the left side of the bed (near my side table where my “Quiet Time” things are located) and I sleep facing left

2.                 My tables at my previous and current office were located on the left side of the room

3.                 The left side of my wallet contains all the “money” cards (atm and credit cards); the right side all my identification cards 

4.                 The left side of my rented flat is the bathroom (which I’m most meticulous about aside from the kitchen)

5.                 On the left side of my mirror/dresser is where I kept jewelry of value  and “everything for the face”, while on the right side are the cheap accessories and “everything for the body”

6.                 My left ear has a mole

7.                 I left Brad because I wasn’t ready to be a mom yet at that time so he’s now with Angelina (now that’s already my imagination working!)

Is it a case of where my “left” is, there my heart will be also? he, he, he.

So what makes you a “rightie”?

Not many of my newfound friends know I have an older sister, Candice. I call her "Ate Can" when the conversation is serious and Tecan when I want to get something from her (he, he, he). This is actually the testimonial that she forced me to write because she wrote one for me (joke!)   Since many will not be able to read it in her account, Im sharing it here with you. This is actually a peek on the "mechanisms" around our family which might probably explain how I turn out to be this way. he, he, he,

Ten Reasons to Hate My Sister, Candice

1. She has always been the smart one – she doesn’t study that much but has never learned how it is to flunk or fail

2.Because of Reason No.1, she got to study abroad – University of New South Wales at that!

3.She has never been fat – she might beg to disagree but she has never reached a waistline above 26” and hips below 34”

4.She had her fairytale ending – married the love of her life (meaning he loves her to death) and they live happily with the handsomest, smartest kid in the world, Jack (which makes me a very doting aunt).

5.She can cook, sew, do crafts, work on house interiors - Martha Stewart, is that you?

6.She can play volleyball, bowling and badminton among others – inspite her small, frail frame.

7.She can have any hair style she wants – long or short, curly or straight, with bangs, layered, etc.

8.She always works on a list and a budget – for groceries, for clothes, for make-up, for shoes, for bags, for gifts and sticks to it (is there such a thing as a disciplined woman shopper?)

9.She never looks stressed and is always poised (because she leaves all the hard work and dirty job to us, her poor sisters =)) ; and

10. Inspite of me being unlovable most of the time, she adores me just the same! (Don’t I just hate her for that?)

Gosh, this is so not me! Me, blogging? Ha! Cartwheel na lahat ng dapat mag cartwheel, sige na.

Ive never been good at writing, only in talking, lotsa lotsa talking. He, he, he. Hey, I taught for 8 good years you know. I made a living out of all my talking!

I cant even remember the last time I wrote something personal. Although I do manufacture 2 technical reports on a weekly average at this time in my career, the closest I had to writing something personal was on a no-occasion card I wrote for someone some time ago. And my sister is harping me on writing her a good testimonial! A testimonial begets a testimonial, is that how it works? So there, that spurred the interest.   

I was just asking my all-around expert sister, Nat what she thinks about it and she told me all those wonderful things I can do on my blog with a digicam and a daily access to the internet. I got excited!  Yes, like waiting-for-a-date excited! I thought having a blog would be so narcissitic but she assured me or rather warned me that I dont have to talk about myself all the time! He, he, he.  Lets see if Im gonna sustain the interest, or rather other people’s interest. With Nat’s help I guess.

Was thinking, Ill be 30 on December 30. Might as well chronicle some of my life’s adventures that I spent half my expected life span on. Gosh, I do sound old.

Again, me blogging?